How about I skip the apologies and just blog? I took last week off from work with the idea I would get caught up with things around the house, like cleaning and such and that didn't happen. I was flat out all week but it wasn't much doing things around the house. After the doctor's verdict, I attended a joint replacement information session and I have lots of people to contact about things like rehab and pain management. I also have found someone who will loan me all the equipment (crutches et al.) that I will need after hospital. I don't relish giving myself injections of anti-clotting agent, but I guess I'll have to. I have tried doing some of the exercises suggested by the surgeon to strengthen my leg muscles and ended up with muscles so sore I could barely get out of bed. This is going to be dicey because my leg muscles are so sore already that any efforts to strengthen them only makes them more sore. I understand the principle but it's hard to figure out how to actually do it. The fibro makes me stiff already but once I get going I can walk OK. In addition to that meeting, I had blood drawn for my routine tests, had a mammogram, waited 2 hours to see my GP, and got a new power of attorney form since hospitals are dangerous places.

J and I went to the NAB cup match between the Swannies and Port. Small crowd probably because there aren't that many Port supporters (but they were all at the match) and it was a gorgeous Sunday afternoon. Swans played like their usual early season selves, kicking directly to members of the opposing team, failure to complete when the ball got down into scoring position, etc. Rhyce Shaw pictured left is a new recruit from Collingwood and showed promise as a speedy little man and we haven't had many of those lately. The biggest shock was that Brett Kirk had cut his famous locks. Why? His shaggy head was distinctive in a sea of either no hair (see left) or blonde, and we have a LOT of blondes. Our new Canadian recruit played a little but if he wants to play ruck he'll have to jump better.

I also had to take some time to recovery from my 2 falls which have left some lovely bruises. Another reason I am stiff and sore.

I have finished the front and back of CAW and joined them at the shoulder with 3 needle bind off. I have cast on for a sleeve and am almost finished the cuff. I held the finished bits up and I think the neck opening comes down too low, but it's a turtle neck so I guess it doesn't matter. I am glad I shortened it because It now is the length of a normal jumper and I am sure it will grow (that is, stretch downwards).

Book report: The Fruit hunters by Adam Leith Gollner. This was another not really BBBB. Since I am a self proclaimed fruit-bat I was intrigued with all the new and mysterious fruits he tracked down, but there were not so gripping but well presented chapters on getting fruit to market, the rise of organic and heritage fruits, and a rhapsody on durians. They sell durians in my local supermarket, but since I've never eaten one and the odor of a ripe one is supposed to be horrible even while it tastes luscious, I'll give it a miss. I'm thrilled when my local market gets big fat beautiful fresh figs in an I pay too much for a couple because I love them. I always have bowls of ripening fruit on my kitchen counter and I eat about 5 pieces of fruit a day on average.

I confess I am also an addict of So You Think You Can Dance and am glued to the TV Sunday and Monday nights. This season I haven't found a favourite to champion like last year (dear Henry) but the choreography gets harder and harder.

I've been stewing instead of blogging. I'll get to the reason for the stewing in a bit, but first to catch up. So far this week I've had blood tests, a mammogram and will go to a meeting about joint replacement. I did sleep a lot over the weekend which is the first thing I do when I have time off--sleep to catch up on what I'm missing. Sleep deprivation really kills me and even 8 hours a night is not sufficient. The other thing I've been doing is in the photo to the left. Massive jam and preserve making. There is plum jam, plum chutney, zucchini pickle relish, wild blackberry jam, tame blackberry jam (from my back yard bush) and mixed berry jelly. The last was a bit iffy; it's set but a soft set as opposed to a firm one. All of the jam and other goodies are taken in to work and I solicit donations which go to charity. The mixed berry jam has a big fan club, as do the pickles. I'll have to watch out for more large zucchini. Of course, I always keep some for myself and for gifts, but you can't make one jar of jam.

Since I have wild blackberries I obviously have been blackberrying again. This time the temperature was more in the normal range and the berries were much bigger and easier to pick. I neglected to mention in the previous entry that we saw in the range of 35 yellow-tailed black cockatoos (photo right) who all flew over in small groups with babies in tow (you can tell by their call). I know in my head that they are common in the forest but it is still a thrill to see them. While I was picking berries among the plantation pines, I kept seeing what looked like brown paper flowers on the ground and I couldn't figure out what they were. I finally worked it out that they must be what's left of a pine cone when a cockatoo has finished with it. After M had picked enough and left, I kept going for another 20 minutes and managed once again to fall, but this time by stepping in a hole created by a rotten log, and landing on my butt, and there was precious little within reach to haul myself up with. More bruises, more stiffness.

What I'm stewing about is the verdict from the orthopedic surgeon that my knees were a hopeless mess and they should be replaced, which led me to sign up to have the left one done at the end of March. He's not even going to charge me extra, just take the insurance payout. Every surface of every bone in each knee was covered in spurs and growths. While I know I said I was going to do this, I am really nervous about it. My knees haven't been the bit of me that hurts the most (that would be my thigh muscles) and I don't know where the relationship of my fibromyalgia will intersect with joint replacement. Not having anyone here when I get out of hospital means I'm going to see if my insurance will pay for an extra week of rehab so I can get around. I won't be able to drive for a while, although since it's my left knee, driving will be earlier than the other. I won't be able to run or kneel, but I can't now anyway. I'm supposed to be exercising the knee and the exercises really do make it hurt. I hope I can rely on friends for rides for a while. After 3 months the other one can be replaced. Did I mention I was really nervous? I go through this whenever I have a medical procedure, even one I know is necessary and that I want to have done. I get cold feet and the urge to get as far away from doctors as I can. Who knows, maybe new knees will make the muscles happier.

I cannot comprehend what the people in Victoria have gone through. The death toll now has hit 200. One article I read today said that the very activity that the Bear and I were planning, moving to the bush, is one of the reasons why things got so bad. Not that we were moving to forested land; even I know a firetrap when I see one. I cannot imagine what it must feel like to have your entire life go up in flames, leaving you with nothing. My brush with fire here in 2003 really put the fear in me. I freak whenever I smell smoke in the air. I don't know how much money it will take to rebuild somebody's life. Furniture and clothes are replaceable but family mementos mean more than that.

My indoor/outdoor thermometer says its 43C outside and "only" 34 inside. I swear I'm actually getting used to this. It's supposed to change overnight and be back in the 20's tomorrow but this heat's gone on so long I feel like I should be wearing desert robes or something different than a singlet (tank top) and shorts. I have to wear shoes or my feet swell so that I can't move them but I'm in my cool Lands End mesh shoes. I'm trying to remember to drink a lot too. I am doing the evaporative cooling on the cheap trick, by doing wash and hanging it around the house to dry. I continue to hear stories about how cold it is in the US and the snow in London and wish that our respective temperatures could be moderated somehow
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At right is the most recent pair of socks, these from Regia Bamboo. In searcing for a link it seems I am the only person in a English-speaking location who got a ball band that said "Bambu" and not "Bamboo". Strange. The yarn is light and lustrous, but tends to split a little too easily. The next sock is already cast on and is a Sockotta cotton in black and purple.




Below is a present given to me by LN and if you can't tell, it's a Peruvian clay spindle. Since I only know how to spin with a spindle that has a hook, and all I had to hand to spin was silk, I didn't do a very convincing job at demonstrationg how it worked. If you look carefully, the clay ball in the middle has incised markings. I wonderful thing to add to my textile bits and pieces. I like collecting these oddments, from bone crochet hooks to pieces of needle lace or filet crochet.





At right is the latest to come off plying and is the Targhee from Susan's Spinning Bunny in the the Clematis Vine colorway. Targhee is bouncy and not as slippery as what I have been spinning lately, so it is more uneven than I would have liked. It hasn't been washed yet but I imagine it will bloom some in the water. I plan socks for it and of course I didn't clount how many meters I had, but I can do that when it gets wound onto the ball winder.


Aside from today's photographic extravaganza, I can describe our black berry picking adventure yesterday. The mountains around Canberra are a) planted in plantation pines and b) full of wild blackberries. Very early in the AM M and I went to our usual spot to find that the forest service had blocked the road (to dirt bike riders) with numerous fallen logs and other associated debris. I made it over the obstacle path and we picked in our usual places. Lots of berries but small ones so not much to show for a bit over an hour's hot labor. On the way back over the logs, I fell, full length. It has made me sore and stiff today, both the fall and the contortions from berry-picking. When we left, I drove down the road a bit and found another patch with berries on flat ground and easy access so I expect we will try there next week, or even this week if it does cool down.

If this is a random act of weather, it's an act that needs to leave, stage left, immediately. I am really tired with this constant heat and the restrictions it puts on me. I can't do much when it's 36C outside and "only" 31C inside; that's out of my comfort range. It's lucky that the only part of my garden that got planted was the raised beds next to the back porch, because they are shaded much more than the baking heat in the other beds. Therefore I have cucumbers and zucchini, and a few bean plants, and one lonely tomato. The blackberries are getting baked on the vines so I am not getting as many as I had hoped. When I go to pick them, I find dried up little nubs rather than the fat black beauties I want. The shaded stalks are OK but the ones that get full sun are getting cooked. The one plant that is reveling in the heat is my grafted citrus.(at right). It has about doubled in size which is why it looks too big for its pot. It is also blooming like crazy, even on the new growth. It's so hard to remove all set fruit as instructed for its early years, especially since I don't know which are lemons and which are oranges yet! I hope I can keep it warm when winter arrives. The plum tree is netted and I have picked a bucket of plums, and made one batch of jam. I would like to make chutney and spiced pl6um sauce but I need cooler times to do it.

I also have been dipping into Italian cuisine, but only via the printed page. I have Autumn in Piedmonte by Manuela Darling-Gassner and The Italian Country Table. Should a day come when I dare heat up the oven, I have lots of ideas, but right now the closest I'm coming is a pasta salad. There are some lovely dishes for baked pasta, which has always been a favourite, but the thought of eating anything hot right now is beyond me. Salad and fruit. If I do lash out it will be for takaway, maybe a chook to graze on.

It's been way too hot to knit anything but socks and I have all but finished the Regia Bambu I started in Findlay, Ohio, in November. I have some purple and black Sockotta to cast on. I've carded a lot of alpaca but to spin it while sitting under a ceiling fan is asking for disaster.

The Imp has been very flat, sleeping the heat away. A good model for this weather, especially when you are wearing a fur coat, if only a light weight one. She had her annual trip to the vet and is supposed to get her teeth cleaned. I will when I have money. Squeezing every penny now, as the case moves into what I hope is its final stages. If my dear Bear knew that 18 months after his leaving I was still waiting for his super funds, which we had considered life insurance, he would be furious.

What does one do on a day when the top temperature is destined to be 35C? You make phone calls, read, and, apparently, blog. There is no "news" as such unless you count hanging one panel (out of four) of new lace drapes in the dining room. The old ones were in the house when we moved in 16 years ago and the sun has begun to take its toll. I wanted lace curtains that weren't violently floral but the combination of that desire and the fact that I need a long drop (floor to ceiling) narrowed my choice. The ones I got are one step away from sheers, but with the block-out drapes behind them, they will do. However, getting up on a stool and balancing to hang them almost crippled me with both knees and ankles complaining to the extent that I could barely walk yesterday. I'll wait a few days before doing another panel.

For those of you who like to dye, or choose colours for weaving, or just the have fun, I direct you to Adobe's free site Kuler. You can create a panel of 5 colours from a colour wheel, from letting the computer select colours to go with one you choose, or upload a picture and choose colors from that. I think it's really nifty especially to someone as colour-challenged as I am. I may like a colour but choosing others that go well with it is beyond me. One thing I found very interesting is that the "favorite" colour panels all seem to be muted tones. Even when one searches "bright", the panels retrieved (by tags assigned by the creator) all are greyed and pale. Is this a trend among designers? Are people no longer interested in saturated colours? I am, although I do prefer my surroundings to be on the soothing side. These colour panels can be downloaded to Adobe software but I find them helpful, just to see what would be complementary colours, or whatever.

Book report: I have been reading mysteries which are the equivalent of bonbons (and I don't even know what they are) and I won't review them. Michael Connelly is at the crease at the moment. A book I picked out for BBBB turned out not to be boring (let alone big) was Heat by Bill Buford. I've always wondered what went on in the kitchen of fancy restaurants and I don't want to know from Gordon Ramsay. Since Bill is an established writer but starts out as "kitchen slave" mincing vegetables and watching what goes on, you learn from the bottom up. I almost wish it weren't an Italian restaurant he was apprenticed in, because I love Italian food and some of the menu items made me swoon. I have never had any desire to eat polenta before but now I'd like to try it. Not needing restaurant sized proportions I went looking for a recipe. Not in Marcella Hazan? Not in the New York Times Cookbook? Joy of Cooking says it's the same as corn meal mush? I know they sell here 2 grades of cornmeal, one labelled polenta. I finally found what I needed in a book I was sucked into by a podcast, namely Lynne Rossetto Kasper (The Splendid Table) and The Italian Country Table. I may have to seek out the best cornmeal, because I import cornmeal for cornbread, etc. which is a finer grind. And, needless to say, I am not making it when the temperature is 35 and I can't stand up for long. Her recipes for Polenta with cheese and balsamic vinegar sounds heavenly. Just what I need, another high carb "staple" to add to the brown rice, yellow rice, couscous, potatoes, pasta, bulgur. cornbread... I think it might be easy to give up meat which those to choose from.

The word for today is humidity. We have had a series of thunderstorms pass through and the last one left its moisture behind and the humidity went up to (for us) a shocking 60%. Boy, my joints hurt. I could barely walk. As I have been sitting here wasting time online the humidity has dropped to 42% and I feel much better. This is one reason why I love Canberra most of the time. The cockatoos that have been screaming since daybreak are not one of the reasons. I found out I was blaming the wrong parrot for decimating my pears; it was the big white ones who were eating them green, not the rosellas.

Since it has been too hot to knit anything but socks (Regia Bambu), I have been spinning and carding alpaca. I have a bag full of fluffy white clouds to spin, but not while sitting in front of a fan. I am plying Susan's Clematis Vine Targhee and will probably go back the the Bendigo purple after that, since it's out and waiting for a matching bobbin to ply. I do love spinning. Since the forecast is for over 30C for the next week, I don't think I will be knitting on CAW.

While I continue to be on a yarn diet despite the lovely fibre cast up on my computer screen, I have bought 2 books in the past 2 months. One is Custom Knits by Wendy Bernard. All but a handful of her knits are top down, and if I weren't already consumed with top-down-desire, this book would make me want to jump right in. (not till it gets cooler) Every design also has some nifty and unusual kink to it, some are decidedly retro, others have unusual details. I am a big fan of Saddle A-line and Slinky Ribs. I haven't tried a scoop neck on and don't know how they'd look on me. The cover design is a Scandinavian style yoke sweater that's been steeked from the neck down and laced back up. Radical, babe.

The second book is Continuous Cables by Melissa Leapman. You know anything Melissa designs is wonderful and her last was Cables Untangled, which I can't remember whether I own or not. Anyone who has read this blog knows I am a cable addict. This book has both wonderful patterns and a stitch dictionary of cables at the back. I'd love to knit the Stowe Cabin Throw Rug but I have a feeling the Imp would disintegrate it quick smart (as she attempts to do with the cheap Oriental throw rug in the entryway on a daily basis). The Tweed Hoodie and the Swirl pullover are both yummy and the Tweed Boyfriend Sweater would suit me too, without a boyfriend to give it to.

The Imp nearly gave me a heart attack earlier in the week when I came back from picking blackberries in the back yard and found the front door blown open. I called and called and went all though my yard and next door's (who are away) and was about to write her off as lost. I sat down on the front porch, close to tears, and called and called. I heard a sound like metal scratching on something and there she was. I think she used one of the grills they place in foundations here to prevent dampness under houses to go to the dark side. What is it with under the house? She's now all excited when I try to go out the front and has to be sternly addressed, sometime pushed away and sometimes locked behind the bi-fold doors to the kitchen.

I did stay up to watch the inauguration Weds morning (our time) and was so blown away with the crowds on the Mall. One of the CBS commentators said the shot of the day was a wide shot of the Mall with flags waving vigorously. Whole families, people who wanted to be there because this was History which a very emphatic capital H. I thought Obama read his speech too fast for the audience to absorb it but he may have been cold. Fortunately the next day was an off day for me so I slept all morning. Certainly a more impressive spectacle than the newly formed cabinet being sworn in by the Governor General. Another example of the US being a nation of the people. Lots of folks I know here either stayed up or watched the replay, which was probably the first time most of them saw the process.

This blog seems to becoming weekly, but not by design. We had another blast from the central desert this week with a few days of 37C and this time it didn't cool off at night. It was pretty miserable and one could do is sit in front of a fan. The Imp became very flat and sprawled out on the lino. So I didn't do much either, went into work later, came home later, to avoid the hot box of the house. I also had the stitches removed from my scalp and now only have a scab (so I'm told since I can't see it). I spent way too much money getting my knees X-rayed before I see the orthopedic surgeon. But if his fee is too high, I will have to postpone the surgery until the super mess is sorted out. I do not want to hit my savings any more.

This week it seems to be fibro fatigue that is hitting, perhaps because of the heat. I just get so sleepy and intend on taking a short nap, but end up sleeping all afternoon. I feel like I'm sleeping my life away, which is why I am not accomplishing the things I want to. The only progress on the fibre front is that I have spent the last two evenings carding alpaca. This is more to do with removing stuff from the dining room table than anything else, but I do want to spin some more, because I gave the bulk of what I had spun the BFLB. I have finished spinning the 4 oz of Clematis Vine colourway Targhee from Susan and I think it will turn out to be a firm and bouncy yarn and good for socks. I always like my spun fibre to rest a few days before I ply it or take it off the bobbin. It may be an old spinner's tale that it helps to do this, but maybe I just like looking at the bobbins while they are resting. It's been too hot to have the entire front of a wool jumper in my lap to knit.

I got caught up (almost) with Weavecast and Syne has had some outstanding interviews. She had the incredible luck to interview Peter Collingwood shortly before he passed away. He was such a towering figure in the weaving community and altho I will probably never weave rugs (altho I'd like to) his book on rug weaving covers much more than that topic. Syne does a great job putting the podcast together and she deserves any help you can give her so if you can spare a few dollars, it would definitely go to a good place.

As any of you who read this blog regularly will know, I am a podcast junkie. I currently have about 150 podcasts on my iPod, covering everything from science to cooking to weaving to society. I listen at work, I sometimes listen in the car but that's sometimes awkward if I'm stopping and starting, and I listen at home while I do housework. It's almost like reading while you do something mindless but necessary with your hands. I listen to a lot of public radio: ABC Radio National, NPR and the BBC. Sometimes I can't imagine life before the iPod.

I think I've solved The Imp's fussy eating problem. It turns out she adores kangaroo, even the stuff that's been marinated in herbs and garlic. She has inhaled the first batch I put down, asked for more, ate that and asked for more again. She's lucky that the was the only red meat I had in the house, and I'm lucky that I finally found something she will eat.

I will be up late Tues night/Weds morning to watch the Inauguration. Too bad it's so cold in DC but I remember inaugurations in the freezing cold, even when there had been snow pushed away to get access. This is Important.

And thank you all, whoever you ar for turning the counter over to 13,000 hits. I truly appreciate it and that you find my rambings interesting.

In tidying the studio I had to put recently (relatively) acquired spinning fibre in a new plastic box. I say relatively because some of these had been hanging around since long before I went on my trip and some I acquired on the road. Here are the prettiest of the braids. Left to right:

• Bluefaced Leicester from Flawful fibers
• Superwash merino from Laughing Rat Studios
• Shetland from Laughing Rat
• BFL from Briar Rose
• Corriedale from Laughing Rat
• BFL in green/rose and rust/red from somebody at Rheinbeck I now forget!

I also have quite a bit from Susan at The Spinning Bunny because LA and I made a foray into the woods near Ithaca and entered her den of wonders. I have 8 oz of merino & silk in a colourway called Earth rose which is pink and grey and white and black. I am spinning her Clematis Vine colourway at the moment which is green and blue and white. I have to find an empty spindle (ha) so I can spin the other half and ply. My favourite craft of all is spinning but one then has yarn that needs to be done something with. So far I've given more away than I've knit but I have enough here, plus all that alpaca so I can actually made something beyond a hat or socks. Four ounces is not enough to make more than a pair of socks and some of those braids are only 4 oz.

I may have said this before, but I have come to the conclusion that Australia doesn't have a climate, just random events of weather. The middle of this week, we were gripped in a spell of 36C and I went back into the routine of closing up the house as soon as the sun got on it, and keeping it closed until the outside temperature dropped below the inside (about 26C). Then two successive fronts went through in a matter of a day and it plunged to 18C and I was glad I hadn't ever taken the wool blanket off the bed. What effect this has on my poor garden I don't know, because everything is so pitiful this year. I will be lucky to get a cucumber by February, and because tomatoes only set fruit within a certain temperature range, I don't know if I will see any of them. I have been weeding and fertilizing and watering, but it may be a lost cause. The snails ate my rhubarb seedling.

I have been experimenting with "social networking" and have joined a couple of sites looking for somebody with the same interests but so far have come up pretty empty. Most of the sites are geared towards teenagers and while us golden oldies are there, the population is low and I have no idea whether I have anything in common with these folks. I did get an invitation to join a group of over 50 Italians, so maybe I can talk about cooking with a real Italian (great for a diet). Speaking of which, in my diet of fish and veggies, I got to try fresh sardines from the markets yesterday and all I can say is yum. Grilled, they were a treat, but the Imp didn't think so. Fussy, isn't she? She's now eating Science Diet instead of nice fresh sardines.

I spent time in the studio yesterday and unloaded the top of the workspace from all the accumulated stuff that had landed on it am ready to see if there is room to shift it down the wall to gain access to the Big Loom. If not I will have to completely rearrange furniture which I am not looking forward to. I really just want to get access to the table loom and my sewing machine so I can hang the curtains in the dining room. The original lace curtains (which were there when we bought the house 15 years ago) have more holes than is decent (UV damage) and I bought very plain continuous curtaining to replace them but I still need to hem them.

Cables After Whiskey is up to the neck shaping! I only hope I have enough yarn for the sleeves...

Firstly a belated HAPPY NEW YEAR! For the first time in many years I stayed up to watch because I was sucked into the hype on TV about how wonderful they'd be. And they were. I almost think watching them on TV is better because the display covers most of the inner harbour and one can't see it all from ground level or even from a high rise. Also, on this night, it was very still and the smoke just hung in the air. It would have impeded the view for those on the ground. I love to watch stuff come off the bridge but you have to be facing the bridge to get the full effect. At any rate, I ate cheese & crackers and spreadable smoked salmon and drank a margarita instead of tacking the full bottle of bubbly in the fridge.

My apologies for the gap in posting (you must be really tired of hearing that). My dear MIL came up for the weekend between Christmas and New Years and for the most part I have been busy with other things. Exciting things like weeding and tearing out ivy, pruning the plum tree, picking berries and making jam, untangling financial stuff that had piled up while I was gone, doing laundry and ironing, you get my drift. Today I am due to mow the lawn but we've suddenly had a cold front go through and it's bloody cold out. No good for hurrying along tomato plants. I planted some watermelon and pumpkin is the vast emptiness but they would really like hot weather. I've had poor germination on beans as well, so this may be a very sparse year.

I am reading Peggy Osterkamp's third volume in her series New Guide to Weaving which is Weaving & Drafting your Own Cloth. This is about how to weave, and boy I wish I had read it before I went to the Weavers School. I was such a total newbie. I didn't know how to sit down and weave cloth, because I'd never actually done it (a scarf doesn't count). I'll admit the section on troubleshooting and all the things that can go wrong is daunting because I'm positive every one of them will happen to me, but everything I've read to far has been helpful. Mind you, she has her prejudices, but every weaver does and you just have to try and get more and more opinions and examples.

P.S. Mowed lawn, took out the "lady's chainsaw" and cut up the piece of dead plumcot into pieces small enough to get into the traskpack, cut down 2 of the main offending shrubs in my neighbour's back yard (with his permission) but the chain jammed and my skill with a chainsaw was exhausted, mulched zucchinis (flowering) and cucumbers (flowering) and fertilized them, watered the citrus, rescued a pot of portulaca that had been sitting totally neglected since before I went overseas and managed to divide and plant 5 seedlings. I swear you cannot kill portulaca. It will be perfectly happy and flower its little head off in a terracotta tub for the rest of the summer whether I water it or not.

Yes, here it is Christmas day and 33C here. I just finished making 98% raspberry jam (I had to add a couple of strawberries and a few boysenberries to make the 5 cups of fruit called for). I am all alone and have done no Christmas preparations since I continued to be sick until this week, and even now I get tired even more easily than I used to. My dear MIL is coming down tomorrow afternoon for the weekend so I'll have some company for a few days. Everyone else seems to have retreated into their families so I am left to my Internet family.

Book reports: How Doctors Think by Jerome Groopman was fascinating and I raced through it while recuperating. It's not about bad doctors per se although he has personal experience with a string of surgeons that may ring a bell with some people. It's more a case of why doctors fall into diagnostic ruts, why too many tests can be a bad thing, why some doctors are better at patient care than others. I've had experience with surgeons who were very bad at patient care; my eye surgeon was brilliant but not a people person. Once I figured that out I knew how to get my voice heard. My first knee surgeon didn't perform the procedure he told me he was going to, and, then when I didn't recover "properly", confessed that he was better with hands than knees. But the failure of tests to do what the patient expects or to give more information than can be really valuable is interesting, especially for someone contemplating knee replacement.

BBBB: In Confident Hope of a Miracle by Neil Hanson, subtitled "the true story of the Spanish Armada." Despite its 600+ pages, it was quite interesting and tells a very different story than the one most of us remember (if anything) about the fate of the Spanish Armada. There were massive delays and incompetence on both sides, financial penny-pinching or outright lack of funds, bad weather, poor ship design, bad tactics, not to mention that the Armada was supposed to lead the way for an invasion of England from the Netherlands. I always wondered why all the silver that came into Spain from the New World seemed to vanish without effect. Philip II spent vast amounts of it on this plan to eradicate Protestantism from Europe and have it become a completely Catholic continent. He believed that God had chosen him to do this, so it would happen. His own military leaders tried to point out the holes in his plan but he refused to listen because he knew God would help him. Thousands died at sea or on the coast of Ireland carrying out this belief.

The other thing that has been on my mind which I am not ready to talk about is my future as a widow in Australia. This year with its long trip in the States and its long lonely sickness and holiday make me wonder what I'm doing here. But nothing can be accomplished by stewing now because it's all a moot point until I can retire which still lies 5 years in the future. My financial status and the fate of the American economy will have a much stronger bearing in the issue than missing the smell of a real Christmas tree and the taste of eggnog with family.

It's berry time here in Canberra, loganberries, and boysenberries mostly but a surprisingly large crop of raspberries too. I'd like to get enough to make raspberry jam but that will be pushing it. Besides, raspberries are so wonderful to eat on their own. To the left you have a small portion of one evening's picking and the first of the world famous mixed berry jam. To the right you have the Imp in the sink of the remodeled bathroom. She is trying to figure out her relationship with this bathroom since I am using it while the toilet in the ensuite leaks. Plumber arrived this AM and supposedly fixed leak. She doesn't like this sink as much as the other one but she loves the bathtub.

Obviously I am alive and 90% recovered. I still have a sore throat and a nagging little cough which I hope means nothing. I am still very short on energy and get tired very quickly. I think I'm going to forget about planting corn and may plant more beans or something else easy. I have little energy for gardening and earlier this week I fell onto the driveway while trying to tug down some dying foliage (or as our bus driver in Kaui kept calling it, foilage). I have another spectacular bruise on my left thigh/hip and felt very shaken up.

Book report: I just finished the 4th volume in S.M. Stirling's post-apocalyptic series that begins with Dies the fire. The next volume is out but only in hardback so I await... Very compelling plot with lots of action. Tends to revel in gore, however. Have moved on to Iain M. Banks's Matter, which is one of his Culture novels. I looked at the size of it and doubted my attention span but I find myself on page 262. As usual there are multiple stories played out simultaneously and at differing levels of the Culture. I really like these novels but they are like nothing else I've ever read in sci-fi. They are beautifully written and complex, yet the characters make the whole complexity make sense. Any reader who is not familiar with his work should be made aware that his novels written as Iain Banks are in a different style and setting from these. The confusion must have gotten to somebody because this one is the first I've seen labeled as a Culture novel on the front. Start with Consider Phlebas or The Use of Weapons.

I'm sorry to go silent on you but apparently what I have is the "summer flu" and it has completely knockend me out. If I can ever stop coughing, I may return to life as we know it. Meanwhile I cough and watch TV and knit.

I am sitting here rereading some of my posts from the trip and feel like I inhabit two different worlds. Here I am at home in the summer with birds singing (and dogs barking) having just picked a sizable quantity of mixed berries. I hung out two loads of laundry and I managed to plant beans and more cucumbers today and do some preliminary pruning of the bay tree and the middle plum. After 90 minutes at that I was pooped and came in to collapse. Tomorrow I am due to go back to work. My legs hurt and my knees are unreliable.

But then I just spent two months in another life where it is winter and Christmas is a really traditional holiday (which I have never felt here) and people are both worrying about their jobs and trying to do Christmas shopping. I felt comfortable there again probably because the Bear is gone and he was my tie to Australia. I am having some difficulty in my own mind figuring out where I am in my life. The physical part is obviously here and I like buying mangoes and lovely cherries. But I have no trouble whatsoever switching over to US mode. I never get confused about which side of the road to be on, or money, and there were only a few words of Australian that remained stuck in my vocabulary (petrol). Australia sometimes seems so terribly provincial and the US so incredibly egotistical. I don't know how to balance the two sides of my life, especially when there are people I care about on both sides of the Pacific.

I really wish I could shake this illness and feel like I have some degree of energy but it hasn't happened yet, although the cough is less draining and my nose needs blowing less often.

This shows what a couple of week's change in location made. The snow was along I-68 in West Virginia and the lovely coast of Kauai was at the end of the cruise as we sailed back to Oahu and Honolulu. Now that I'm home it seems like a bit of a dream. Everyone said I was doing too much but, when I got beaten down, it was at the end of the trip when I had just been on the road too long. I've already gotten 2 of the boxes mailed from Maryland and I forgot Quarantine's dislike of spiced tea and they confiscated my Constant Comment. But I have Cascade Sierra (a wool & cotton blend) and one of the 2 skeins of discontinued Noro Big Kureyon in a red/purple to make a shrug from a book of patterns for little bits of Noro (which is all I can afford). I'm thrilled to be back knitting on CAW.

I am still sick and run down. I managed to get cucumbers and zucchini planted today before I ran out of steam.

I am sitting in my very own bed and trying to ignore the pain in my legs and the annoying persistent cough. Yes, I am still sick. I spent Weds of the cruise in bed and had to cancel the second snorkel trip. It's not like there aren't any available coral reefs in our country, so I can do it again another time. I think a lot of the wow factor for most Americans on the cruise was the tropical island bit. Living in Australia (and having lived in Florida for 5 years), all the foliage and such wasn't all that exciting. And I was unprepared for the wall of humidity which made everything hurt. Oh, and nobody told me it rained a lot. I didn't get to wiggle my toes on Waikiki because it was raining the whole time despite weather forecasters and tourist guides assurances that it was going to be fine.

A few very general comments about the Hawaii experience. I liked NCL and its policy of letting you eat where and when you wanted. The food was good and you choose what to eat and pretty much everything is on offer from roast meat to sushi. The cabin was small but manageable and we had a balcony as well. Unfortunately, our cabin was on the side that faced the wharf most of the time, and the ship docks at a commercial shopping terminal so you get a great view of containers on docks. I am so tired of Hawaiian music and shirts I may never want view anything of that style again. Read the fine print on your contract before you figure that you've paid for everything. This may not be a surprise to other people who do cruises, but there was a fee added for each passenger each day labeled a "service charge" which was supposed to mean you didn't have to tip people. We tipped the waiter who was extra nice to us and baggage handlers anyway. You get absolutely nothing free to drink except water out of the tap, and tea and coffee with meals. So every can of soda or water costs. My second bus tour was not very good. It was a trip to Waiemea Canyon via the life story of the bus driver. Very little about the canyon, stops to buy souvenirs, and a stop for 15 minutes to go to the only lookout over the canyon. Yes the sight is pretty spectacular (I'll post some photos later) but I'm not sure that a trip by houses with their real estate information was what the trip was for.

The hotel on Waikiki was very nice but should be at the price we paid. However, the area around the big hotels is all designed for shopping, both high end boutiques (Chanel, Dior) and the same souvenir stands selling the same stuff as everywhere. We finally went to a bar for a meal and got hamburgers since dinners in the hotel started at $25, Lots of Japanese tourists spending their yen. Many signs only in Japanese. The only souvenir I bought was a T shirt with "Obama surfs" on the front and a little patriotic verse followed by "President Obama 2009" on the back. I don't know for a fact if he does (or did) surf but he did grow up in Hawaii.

Unfortunately, no matter how much you like your cabin mate, you will get on each other's nerves occasionally. I am sure I was cranky because I was tired and sick and hurting and would have preferred to be left alone. But for the most part dear MIL was good company and we had some laughs. She went out at ports and went shopping in Walmart while I was trying to see natural wonders and maybe a bird (besides the hundreds of chickens that populate Kauai).

I am also having extremely mixed feelings about the dual citizen business. Having spent 2 months in the US on my own, I really had a good time and really had a ball with all my friends. I really like parts of American culture and life style and feel sort of constricted in Australia. Now that I no longer have the Bear, the ties to this country are not as strong. My friends in American are for the most part closer to me than any one I have here. I miss them all the time. I do love Australia and many things about its lifestyle and culture but there are a lot of things I don't like as well and time hasn't changed that. I can't go back to the US without medical coverage so I have to stay here unless I stumbled across a man willing to marry creaky old me and bundle me into his health cover. No, I'm not looking.

I hope to get out of bed tomorrow and go shopping for groceries. My housesitter left everything pristine but rearraged things a bit oddly. I have done 2 loads of laundry and have another yet to do.

Greetings from the high seas, somewhere oout of Hilo on the Big Island, on our way to Kona, on the other side of the island. I did actually make it here. A brief recap from my last post: I woke in Morgantown to find an inch of snow on the ground and more coming down. On the way out to the car my left knee went out from under me and has stayed painful, which probably means I tore something in it once again. I made it to DC, renewed my car rental at Enterprise and met up with my ex. We had lunch and I checked into my el cheapo motel. I was feeling so beat up and my legs hurt so much that I decided to curtail my activities, and rest for at least a day or 2 so I would be able to go to my planned visit at LC and see my friend R and have dinner at her house, if not stay with her. Once again my ex was super-supportive and helpful and even ferried me to the Hill and stopped by for dessert and to take me home from R's house. The LC visit was not as helpful as I hoped but I did see some very old friends.

I made my plane to LA and then to Honolulu and met my dear MIL. We got to the cruise ship and found our cabin. I was once again feeling tired and beaten about--this is the end of the trip and my stamina is very limited. I have spent the first two days of the cruise in our stateroom (the size of a small motel room, but with a balcony) but my MIL has ventured out at each stop. I was scheduled to go snorkeling the morning after we arrived but I cancelled it. Today I went on a trip to Volcanoes National Park, which was supposed to be the most important point, and it was spectacular. Huge calderas, steam vents, jumbled piles of lava. I'll try to post photos when I get home but I am sure the scale will be impossible to grasp. We might see molten lava falling into the sea from the boat tonight, but from land you are not allowed anywhere near it. The excursion was just what I was hoping for and am so glad I did it. I have rescheduled a less taxing and smaller-group snorkel trip off Kona tomorrow but today I have been coming down with a cold despite my best efforts to avoid it. If it's bad tomorrow I don't know how you blow you nose and/or cough in a dive mask and snorkel. Thursday it's Waimea Canyon which is mostly a bus trip. I will be very sad if I can't snorkel but it really depends on how I feel tomorrow. Sailing is kinda interesting, a slight rolling feeling but this is a big ship so I can't imagine feeling seasick. A cold was NOT on the agenda.

My luggage is crammed full and hard to manage so we will try to get it from the boat to the hotel in Waikiki and then HOME! I am very homesick, if you can't tell.

I am sitting in a motel in Morgantown WV (West Virginia for those outside the USA) where I forced myself off the road after too long at the wheel. I had disagreements with Mandy, ended up driving too far in the wrong direction, was driving through blowing snow all day at 75MPH (You Aussies do the maths). A recipe for an accident with monster 18-wheelers and people driving even faster all around. I stopped here at 3PM because I knew I was not going to make it to DC in what passed for daylight. Then I pulled the best trick of the trip: I locked my purse (with phone) and keys in the boot when I took out my suitcase. I phoned Enterprise and talked to a very nice man in St Louis who has friends in Perth (WA) who was diligent in trying to find my rental contract. No go. Fortunately there was a local Enterprise employee willing to drive here and read the VIN off the car to prove it was theirs so they could authorize it to be unlocked. Three hours later, I am safe and warm and typing away while drinking Gonzo Imperial Porter (9.2% alcohol) and trying to feel no pain. May I state categorically that, while the Dodge Avenger is roomy and has an aux-in jack for my iPod, it is underpowered (and therefore guzzles fuel on hilly terrain) and has the mushiest steering I ever have driven. I don't exist because I have an overseas credit card. MasterCard is going to get a very angry letter when I get home. I had this happen repeatedly throughout the US.

The last few days at BFLB's house were quiet. A little more yarn shopping so I now have 5 boxes to ship home, but there are books for an M Bag. Yesterday it snowed spectacularly to little effect, so we stayed inside by the gas fireplace and watched college football. It's spooky that I can remember gridiron tactics and plays when I haven't watched it in 20 years. College ball is more interesting than NFL anyway because people get more excited. Speaking of which I checked on the Swans fixture for 2009 and found a number of weekend day games at the SCG that are possible for Canberrans. I'd love to go back to the SCG for a match, providing it's not raining.

You might have noticed I neglected to mention The Election. I'm just so pleased to be here for this epic moment in American life (and to participate) and to watch a new era begin. I sincerely hope and firmly believe that Obama will get the best people in the country and the country is ready for change. W was apparently quoted as saying "I guess I just had one of those Presidencies" as if the entire world isn't suffering from his idiocy for 8 years. American needs to do serious work on its health care system and financial infrastructure before more people are made unemployed and/or homeless. A friend told me she was much more ready to work on any project offered her to save her job and there are lots of others not so lucky. Another friend faces major surgery without health insurance.

I listened to some good podcasts, including one a rant against a rant against boomers. Gen X etc. don't realize how much of what they take for granted (even a bi-racial President) is the result of boomers. I won't rant but the podcast ended with the Jimi Hendrix opening riff for Purple Rain so I put Jimi on the radio and cranked it up. That got the blood pumping for a while. Also listened to an interesting podcast about mythical beasts with excerpts from a new novel called The Bestiary by Nicholas Christopher. I must buy it. Both podcasts were from International Public Radio's To the best of our knowledge which were very good listening on the road. New to my podcast lists.

Thanks to whomever you are that turned me to over 12,000 hits. I hope I have amused or interested you on my Big Adventure. It's almost over but I may be able to blog from the cruise ship! I am ready to leave snow and driving behind and relax. It has been so super seeing so many old friends and making new ones. I am truly blessed by knowing some really wonderful people and will continue to be torn by loving living in Australia with all my friends there, and the delights of the US marketplace and menu, and all my friends here, the oldest I think so far I've known 48 years.

Ohio is flat. This is not news but is something I forget when I've been away in more hilly terrain for years. We (BFLB and her friend M) drove up to the edge of Lake Erie yesterday to attend an open house at Just for Ewe at Marblehead. Christi has a tiny house full to the bursting point with gorgeous yarn ranging from Noro to Cascade 220 and I put another dent in my credit card. Since I bought no yarn for all of 2007 and most of 2008 and gave a box full to fellow Canberra knitter C, I feel like I can splurge a little. Two skeins of a discontinued Noro for a shrug are my favourite purchase. I've finished two pairs of socks so far on this trip and am busily working on another from Trekking wool and bamboo I bought in Virginia. It has sort of a crunchy hand but is getting silkier as I knit more and I think it will soften when washed. BFLB knits very colourful socks with pattens while I remaind a member of the "plain stockinette socks" group. The last two pair have been with ribbed uppers simply because I knew I would have plenty of yarn (Trekking and Opal are both generous in yardage).

Saturday my other brother drove over from Indiana for lunch and we had a most cheerful lunch. He and I have spent probably the least amount of time together out of the disconnected family but we share a love of science fiction. I used to love summer stays at his house because I would try and read as much as I could from his library while I was there. He confirmed my bitter memories of my parents' endless fighting, which I dreamed of running away from as a child. I was really unaware of a lot of stuff when I was young and really didn't understand what a loving family meant until I met my ex's family who welcomed me in as a daughter. It's nice to reclaim my family bit by bit even if too many years have passed when we should have been enjoying each other's company.

My health has been good except for Friday when I felt uncomfortable and out of sorts all day. In the evening I asked BFLB to take my blood pressure (had a hunch) and it was through the roof. Fortunately, whatever it was disappeared by the next morning and I was back in normal BP. Now I know what high blood pressure feels like. I have also forgotten to take my pills on a couple of occasions, no doubt because there is no routine to my life at the moment.

Yes, I am still alive. I have made it to BFLB's home in the Buckeye state without problem after spending a day and a half with my brother in Buffalo. Unfortunately, while I was there, I took a Neurontin at bedtime because my legs were killing me and when I woke up I was extremely dizzy and promptly fell down, hitting my head on the corner of their dresser on the way down. I spent most of the day resting and recuperating from that adventure, but the weather wasn't very nice and I've been to their house so many times that there wasn't any sightseeing I felt compelled to do. So we talked and looked at family photos and I feel a little bit more connected to a family that had been mostly lost to me all my life. My father kept all his children isolated and was always in the room when we got together so we never could talk comfortably. Since he died, the children have become much closer and we regret all the years we lost.

Since I've been here I've been catching up on sleep, eating far too much, and just relaxing. Friday I went to vote early absentee and so our delight but also sadly not so good for my legs, there was a three and a half hour wait in line to vote! I can't tell you how many people that was but the line moved very briskly and snaked all the way through the lobby of the building. We struck up a conversation with a nice "young" lady who wanted to learn to knit, had firbromyalgia, and was voting for the first time. My guess is that the crowd was about 50/50 white and African American and was very patient and upbeat. I hadn't realized the extent of the bombardment voters are getting, especially in a crucial state like Ohio, from mostly the "other" side of the political divide, until I got here. I am very glad I came to vote even if I did cause a minor hiccup when I got there and told them I was not allowed vote on anything but the federal ballot. I don't want any excuse for them to not count my ballot this year like they did the past 2 elections. I should look who won the ACT election which took place last week.

Other events along the trip were catching up with friends I went to junior high and high school whom I haven't seen in decades. Needless to say, there was a lot of talking at do. Then I headed off to near Utica to visit with a former work colleague who also happened to live across the street from me in Ohio and who was responsible for one of the photos I sent the Bear when we first were long-distance courting. It rained one day so we talked all day; the next day we drove to Itaca to go to Susan's where I just had to buy some gorgeous spinning fibre, even some angora which I have never tried before. But it was 50% off so how could I not? Said friend also took me to a book store which was also dangerous. Books can be mailed home cheaply, and fibre squooshes. Not so sure about the jam I bought yesterday... Utica got a foot of snow the day after I left and it was snowing lightly as I drove around the end of Lake Erie in the way to central Ohio. I was not particularly happy to see that, but lake effect snow doesn't bother much except those that live down wind of the Great Lakes.

Yesterday we bought jam, cider, wierd beer, bratwurst, et al., and went to a perfomance of music by a folk group whose soprano provides me with a Franklin County address for my absentee voting rights. Today, who knows what mischief we will get into?